Matt O'Sullivan

First Update

So I spent some time on my website again. When I checked the dates on the previous commits in git it was three years ago that I last attempted this.

Obviously, the appropriate thing to do was to delete nearly everything and start over. This is a natural process that happens on a three year cycle: I start trying to write something and then get distracted by trying to perfect the design and layout. Eventually I reach a point where I am, if not satisfied, then at least not actively hating my work and that feeling of accomplishment allows me to tell myself to take a "well earned" break. Nothing ever gets written.

It's not because of a lack of ideas either. I keep some notes of various things that come into my head while out walking that would all generate a lot of good starting points. However, when it comes time to put finger to keyboard I find all motivation has been drained from me.

I believe one of the reasons deep down inside is that I fear that no-one wants to read what I write. I get Writer's Block when I think that I must produce some amazing piece of writing worthy of living permanently on the internet. This feeling is especially strong when I compare myself to all those who inspire me and have produced lots of great writing.

My goal now is to try and overcome this fear so that there won't be another three years, another re-design, and yet more empty pages.

Send me your thoughts